Pregnancy Tests and Patrick Henry

This week I taught Patrick Henry's "Give me liberty, or give me death!" speech.  It is hard sometimes to passionately teach such amazing and historical works of art when your "audience" just turns to their neighbor and says (in a whiny, breathy voice), "This is soooo stupid."  Anyways, I digress. . . in Henry's speech he states his life philosophy, ". . .it is natural to man to indulge in the illusions of hope. We are apt to shut our eyes against a painful truth . . . For my part, whatever anguish of spirit it may cost, I am willing to know the whole truth; to know the worst, and to provide for it."  I had my students reflect in their journals on the wisdom or foolishness of Henry's philosophy and compare it to how they approach difficulty.  I don't think in this passage Henry intends to communicate that we should not ever hope.  Hope when put in the right place/being is a good thing.  Here he chides his fellow colonists for putting their hope in something that is not worthy of their trust- the English government.  He encourages them to be grounded in reality; to open their eyes to the "painful truth" that war with England is coming and they should begin amassing an American militia to prepare for this war. 
When I reflect on how this philosophy relates to our embryo adoption situation I can see how I have struggled at times to be hopeful.  I like Patrick Henry think it is better to know the WHOLE truth even if it hurts so that I can move on, fight it, get prepared, etc.  I find myself at times thinking, "I just wish I could get to the transfer and two-week wait so I can just know if this transfer will work or not."   True to form today Dan and I went to Dollar Tree to purchase gobs of pregnancy tests so that I can know of our transfer results (good or bad) as soon as possible.  I know though that the hope I do have for a successful transfer is not ill placed.  As a follower of Christ my eyes have been opened to the reality that our purpose in life is to serve a loving, just, merciful, and wise God and not to seek personal fulfillment.  Sometimes his plans for my life do not match my own plans.  He may choose to have us go through a painful situation or he may choose to give us the desires of our heart.  Either way I can have peace in knowing that the one whom I hope in, the one who is my source of hope in our embryo adoption, is one who is worthy of my trust.  No matter what happens with this transfer we are acting according to His purpose for our lives in pursuing parenthood and embryo adoption and He will sustain us in difficult times and rejoice with us in times of blessing. 

I feel like I have so many more thoughts on this matter.  I think my EA blog buddies, Aaron and Jennifer who are preparing for their third transfer with the NEDC (their first two transfers did not result in a pregnancy) have beautifully expressed in their posts "Moving Forward",  "Thoughts regarding our third transfer", and "Balancing our emotions with God's truth"  how Dan and I feel about our own infertility/embryo adoption experience in relation to our relationship with Christ.  Please pray for them and for Dan and I as we approach our transfers in the upcoming weeks!